UPDATES on Castan

If anyone would like to keep updated: http://www.facebook.com/BelieveInCastan

My life goings on-baby steps

Everything is going ok. My girls have been hellions the whole time I have been in the hospital as well as while we have been staying in the Ronald McDonald House. I think they just need to get back on schedule but who knows when that will happen. My brother (and foster child) has made it his job to make sure I am stressed to the max. He started with skipping school and getting suspended but has most recently broken his leg and torn his ligaments. My husband has been my strength. If it weren't for him I would have lost my mind...If I haven't already. The one thing I have been truly happy about is how well my little Superman has been doing. They daily increase how much milk he is fed. He was moved to a bed with no humidity 4 days earlier than normal premies. He is on 23% oxygen and has had no issues with breathing. I am now allowed to hold him once per shift! The 2 things we are still working on are the valve in his heart closing (the echo was not positive it was closed so he has to have another) and him gaining weight (he has been fluctuating but has not got below 1lb 11oz.) For him being only 10 days old and the doctors saying he had only a 10% chance to live before I had him I think he is doing pretty friggin amazing! I love that little guy.

Liver please?

The founder of Facebook decided to try to help rally people to become organ donors. On average 18 people per day die awaiting a transplant. According to organdonor.gov 100 million people are organ donors. Facebook is adding links to offer to be organ donors and to tell your story of how you chose to become a donor. Facebook is a possible way to get donors in touch with recipients. The only issue is making sure people actually register.

This is very interesting. I always thought of Facebook as just a "fun" site. I use it to rant about things and to show off my kids. Never in a million years would I have thought about posting about becoming a donor. I am on the fence about becoming a donor. I think it is an amazing thing for someone to do. I just don't know if I want my family to have to go through the possible grief that may come with them making the decision to "pull the plug" and give my organs to someone. I am interested in becoming one but I would have to think some more on it.

This plucks at my heart strings

Baby Avery was not expected to live past age 2. Her dad decided to keep a bucket list of things they hoped she would get to do. They were meant to be lighthearted and hopeful. After starting the blog to let friends and family know how Avery was doing with her disorder her dad added the bucket list. Her genetic disorder caused her to have pulmonary issues causing her lung to collapse and put her in cardiac arrest. The bucket list got 2.4 million views. The readers thought it was Avery's mother who wrote about Avery. Baby Avery passed away at 6 months old on April 30.

This story strikes very close to home. I feel for Avery's parents. To know that your baby may not live is such a horrible experience. No parent should ever have to know that pain. It leaves you feeling helpless. I hope Avery's parents can eventually feel peace. I refuse to say that everything happens for a reason because I can't stand when people say that to me. I know it wouldn't matter to them what I think since I don't know the family but I sincerely hate that they had to lose their little girl. I do think she is in a better place and she is no longer in pain. That is the only plus side to something so tragic.

My life goings on-Superman makes his debut!

This week has been a crazy one. Thursday night my contractions started to get closer together at around 7:30. I have a high tolerance for pain but they got so bad that I was crying and could not get comfortable. I tried getting demerol but it didn't relieve the pain. My nurse checked my cervix twice and there was no change. They thought I had an infection in my uterus so they drew my blood to test it. Finally at 4:15 am the nurse came back and said my white count was high so she was hooking me up to antibiotics which should slow down the contractions. She checked my cervix one last and I was finally dilated-to 4-5cm. She rushed me to labor and delivery. They prepped everything and gave me the epidural at 4:50. The nurse checked me again and I was fully dilated and ready to push. After 1 single push Castan Bradlee Bastian Brown made his appearance at 5:03 am. He weighed a whopping 1lb 12oz and is 14 in long. They got him over to the heat lamp and he immediately started crying. This was amazing as they didn't think his lungs would be developed at all. They laid my little superman on my chest and he whimpered like a little puppy. Castan has done so well!! He was taken off of the ventilator yesterday. His jaundice is going down. He has had no issues with breathing. My little guy is astounding everyone!!! Hopefully tomorrow he will be taken  off the bili light. Well time for me to go to bed so I can get up early to go see him.

420

This article is about a 4:20 celebration in Colorado. This celebration had gone on in the past. On average 10-12000 people had attended. This year was a different story. The police closed the campus to outsiders and put a fish based fertilizer down to disuade people from gathering. There were still people in attendance. Before the event happened 3 students were arrested. At the normal 4:20 time a man tried to rally the crowd to start the smoke off as usual but then ducked under the tape and took off across campus. This year it seemed no one got their smoke on.

I don't understand why they changed things. I am not a pot smoker. I don't care for it. However I don't see what the reasoning was. They let the rally happen in the past with no problems yet all of the sudden they decided not to this year? I don't think everyone should run out and be stoned 24/7 but I don't see what pot hurts. The people I know who smoke are all very calm and laid back. They never hurt anyone and don't like confrontation. No one has died of a marijuana overdose. Yet it's illegal. Whereas people die from alcohol poisoning all the time. There are drunk drivers. Alcohol causes aggression. But it's legal. Makes no sense to me.

My life goings on-not so hot

So Tuesday my water broke. As some of you may have read I am not due until July 4th. They gave me steriods to help develop his lungs and antibiotics to decrease my risk of infection. I was having contractions every 20-30 mins when I first got in but they have stopped. I am in the hospital until I have Castan. Wednesday I talked to the neonatologist here in the NICU. He gave Cas a 10% chance to live. If he was a normal 29 weeker he would have an 80-85% chance but because his disorder made him extra small his lungs will be extra small. The doctor was very compassionate and explained to us the options we have when Cas is born. He said he will do water we want him to even if he thinks it isn't helping Castan any.

My daughters are not handling all of this very well at all. Especially my oldest. She cried so hard at church Wednesday night that her teacher had to get my step mom to take her home early. I asked her Thursday why she had cried. Her little lip started quivering and her eyes filled with tears when she said "because I was worried about you and if Castan is going to be sick and have problems." I felt like my heart was shattering. This 7 year old little girl of mine was worried about me and her baby brother. She should be trying to sneak candy or worrying about what dress to wear. So I explained the options that the doctor gave us. I asked her and my 5 year old daughter if they would rather we just spend whatever time we have with Castan and just let him go to heaven so he wouldn't be sick or if they wanted us to try to fight to keep him alive. Both of them immediately said they wanted us to fight for him. I told them that's what we plan to do but that the doctor said if we see that Cas wasn't going to make it that they could say goodbye to him. My baby girl said "good that's all I care about because I didn't get to say goodbye to my other brother before he died." This is all so heartwrenching. I hate that my girls are having to go through all this turmoil again. They are so young yet are acting like little adults. I hope everything is ok for their sakes.

Underwear bomber

This article is about the terrorist known as the "Underwear Bomber".  Umar Farouk AbdulMutallab was convicted of trying to bring down a plane with a bomb in his underpants on Christmas Day 2009.  The plane had 289 passengers.The 25 year old plead guilty in October and was sentenced to life in prison in February. He has been moved to the FBI's Supermax prison in Colorado.

This world just gets scarier every day. Every time I turn around I hear about another terrorist. I personally don't see how someone would want to sacrifice their lives to kill a bunch of innocent strangers. I guess I will never understand. I am thankful I was not raised in that kind of environment. My parents weren't all that great but at least I can go through life knowing that I have no desire to kill another person.

My life goings on-just a contest

So my sister in law thought she would be nice and enter me in a contest to win a very beautiful ring. This contest is about a struggle the contestants have gone through. My sister in law posted one of my maternity pictures and told my story of losing my first son and now going through the problems with Castan. At first I thought this contest was awesome. There are some incredibly touching stories. Then the owner of the business hosting the contest started changing the rules. She allowed some contestants to post pictures of their deceased babies while not allowing others. This started a huge controversy with a loss support group I have joined because there were several moms on their who were denied their pictures. One poor mom was denied even though the picture was of her baby boy's feet! And the picture had been taken when he was still alive. I tried to defend that mom because there were pictures of other babies. Instead of allowing the baby's feet the owner made the other moms take theirs down. I asked to be taken out of the contest because it was unfair but she hasn't taken my picture down. Even though I am currently in second place I just don't feel right participating. I think if I win a prize I will give it to the mom who was denied. I just think it is so sad how some people bend things to suit what they want.

She just wants to win!

This article is about how sports and pageants are starting to allow transgender people enter them. It discusses how Jenna Talackova started taking hormones at 14 then had a sex change at 19. Her dream has always been to compete in the Miss Universe pageant even though there are pageants specifically for transgenders and transvestites. After originally being denied Donald Trump decided to go ahead and let Jenna participate. Jenna is trying to have the rule that you have to be a "naturally born woman" removed. The rule has been dropped in alot of highschool sports. The main concern is that males who become females still have testosterone which is banned. According to Jenna there is a testosterone suppressant that they can take which will allow them to participate.

I say go for it. I don't think it should matter if they are "naturally born" or not. In the end they have made themselves women and are treated as such in every other matter. So why not let them participate in pageants as well? I personally would never get a sex change. Guys are too smelly. (Only kidding fellas.) But I say too each their own. If one of my daughters chose to have a sex change I would support her. Sure it would be difficult and confusing but I think everyone should be allowed to make their own choices.

My life goings on-Waiting

This week my girls have decided to misbehave nonstop. Normally they are really good but lately they have me pulling my hair out. On top of that my son is causing problems. I have bad some bleeding and contractions. I had to go to the Labor and Delivery unit last night because of the bleeding. Turned out I am already dilated 1 cm but I wasn't having contractions so they sent me home with some sleeping pills. I just can't wait until July so we can get our life situated again. All of this waiting and not knowing what to expect is going to make me crazy.

Manson nutty?

Charles Manson is to be reviewed to see if he should be moved to a psychiatric hospital. His lawyer says that he has never even met Manson. He is unsure if Manson will even come to the hearing. Manson is now 77 years old. Originally Manson was sentenced to death for the murder of Sharon Tate and 6 others. Manson has been denied parole 11 times. He hasn't shown up for a parole hearing for 15 years.

I don't know much about the Manson family murders. I've never read the "Helter Skelter" book and the murders happened long before I was born. But this guy had to know what he was doing. I don't think he had mental issues. I think he was a messed up man but I don't think he should be able to just go into a psychiatric hospital. He should either have to stay in prison for life or follow through with the life penalty. Everyone should have to pay for their crimes.

Did these people even read?

This article is about the new movie The Hunger Games. It hit $300 million this past weekend. Alot of people are not liking the fact that there are races other than white as characters in the movie. People have been tweeting that they can't believe some of the characters are black. Alot of people think that white people are the default.

This infuriates me. Not only are people being racist and ignorant but are showing that they haven't read the books. Both Thresh and Rue were described as being "dark" with characteristics of African American people. I think it's so stupid that people can be so low as to talk bad about the characters just because of the color of their skin. If they do a good job as the character and they are described as not being white in the books why does it matter if they aren't white in the movie? I just have never understood racism. It's so pointless.

Does your baby have stinky peepee?

This article discusses why a baby's urine may smell. If a baby has a fever and smelly urine it may be a sign of a UTI. Bacteria from the intestines entering the urine could be the cause of the smell. If the UTI is not taken care of it can cause kidney problems. Other things can cause urine to change smell. Diabetes makes urine smell sweet. Different food can change the smell of urine as well as different medicines. If there is a stench you are unsure of you should bring it up to the pediatrician.

Now I don't go around smelling my kids' diapers when they are babies. I have always hated cheerios because I think baby urine smells like them. I found the article interesting though since I am about to have another baby who is expected to have some issues. I knew that fever and fussiness could be a sign of a UTI since my oldest had one when she was a couple of months old. However when she had hers I don't recall it smelling any different than normal. Guess I will keep my nose alerted when I have Castan.

Higher numbers

This article is stating that America as a whole is more obese than we think. The BMI numbers that we use now don't take into account the percentage of fat on a person's body. It also doesn't show how healthy a person really is. New York's state commissioner thinks the BMI numbers that indicate obesity should be lowered from 30 to 24 for women and 28 for men. The BMI shows a less accurate measurements for women because we lose muscle tone quicker than men.

I have never liked the BMI thing. Even when I was a teenager it considered me obese. I'm not saying I am in great shape but I think I am far from obese. I have always weighed more than I look. To take a number like the BMI and say I am obese because of my weight is ridiculous to me. They need to test other things to find out if a person is healthy. Muscle does weigh more than fat and there are people I know who are mostly muscle yet they are considered obese. I hope that changes are made to the BMI or get rid of it completely.

My life goings on-Feeling more hopeful

Since I had my second opinion last Tuesday I have done alot of research on my son's disorder. He actually has a chance to live. He will probably have a lot of physical and mental disabilities. I joined a support group of other moms with children that have the disorder. They have given me hope that Castan will be ok. This disorder is very rare. Full blown Triploidy only happens in 2% of pregnant women. Castan has Mosaic Triploidy. There are only 41 cases of Mosaic including mine in the world. I have been talking to some of the moms and have started to prepare myself for a long road. My main worry is the way my daughters will handle it. My older 2 have dealt with the loss of their first brother so they already know what might happen. My 2 year old doesn't understand at all. She just can't wait for her brother to get here. Just going to keep hoping that Cas will be ok.

Wow. Just wow.

This article is about a 37 year old man who had an entire face transplant. In 1997 he suffered a gunshot wound to the face. Because of the extent of the damage the man wore a mask for 15 years. His new face was a combination of his own face and the face of a donor. The entire operation took 36 hours. Richard is only the 23rd patient to receive a face transplant in the world.

This story is so amazing to me. The things that we are now capable of doing through medicine are just astounding. For that man to finally want to show his face after 15 years of hiding has to feel so good to him. The generosity of the donor is also wonderful. The donor not only donated his entire face but he also donated organs to 5 other patients. I am glad I stumbled across this story. It cheered me up for that man to get what he has wanted for so long.

Thank you to them

This article is about a man who was Vietnam war. He was 23 years old when he enlisted. He was more priviliged than some and didn't have to enlist. He did it because he said he couldn't watch others his age die while he hid behind being priviliged. He didn't have his first flashback until 15 years after the war. The flashback occured while he was in a business meeting. He walked in the room and saw a pile of dead bodies on the table. One study showed that 472,000 Afghan and Iraqi veterans suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.

I just want to say thank you to all veterans who have fought to protect our rights. To be able to do that takes a very special person. I have a few friends who are fighting for our country right now. The thought of losing any of them terrifies me. I feel bad for their spouses. They have to sit there wondering if they will ever see their wife/husband again. They raise their children and try to make sure they know who their mamas/daddys are. My heart aches for those who have lost someone. It aches just as much for those who have got their spouses back as completely different people. War does change some people. Sometimes for the worst. I just thank God that I have my family all with me.

My life goings on-Spring Break

It was nice to have time with my family over Spring Break. Unfortunately thanks to the rain our plans of camping and fishing were ruined. We didn't get to do much. We did go to House of Bounce one day and Chuckee Cheese another. All in all it was a pretty good week. The only bad thing to happen was that I found out my friend's unborn baby has fluid on her brain and may not live. As I am dealing with the probability that my own baby isn't going to make it this hit a sore spot with me. I really hope she isn't told news like ours. I am dreading tomorrow. She gets her amnio results back then and I have an appt to see another specialist to get a second opinion about my son. I am so afraid that if the doctor says the same thing that I will lose hope. I'm normally a pretty optimistic person but this is too much for me. Even just seeing baby boys tears me up. Wow how did my rant start out good and end on such a depressing note? My bad!

My life goings on-getting by

This week hasn't been so bad. I have had my bad days and my good. Seems that is how the next 16 weeks is going to go. I had a panic attack the other day because my son didn't move for over 17 1/2 hours. Other than that, just keeping hope as much as possible.

Today we got my daughters' Easter pictures done. I can't wait to get them back! They were all so good and did everything the photographer asked. It was alot of fun. I know alot of moms think their kids are gorgeous, but I am 100% sure. :-) When I can't go a day without being told how cute they are, pretty sure it has to be true. Yup, I am a proud mama and you will most likely hear alot of bragging from me.

Is my facebook really that serious?

This article is interesting to me. It talks about how the government now has a list of around 500 words that are considered "bad" words. If someone posts them on their facebook, or tweets them on their twitter, the government will then monitor their accounts. Some of the words are as simple as subway or San Diego.

This is just crazy. Is the government seriously that interested in people's social network sites? Do you really think that terrorists or drug dealers would tweet about what they plan to do? I guess the government is trying to keep us "safe" but to me it is just another way to control our lives. I wonder if they are monitoring me. I know I have used the word subway since my husband works at a subway. I have also used infection when my daughter had an ear infection. Sorry to tell them, but this stay at home mom has no intention of blowing up any buildings or anything equally insane.

Dedication

This article is about a mother who spent 33 years trying to find the remains of a baby she gave birth to when she was only 23. The baby had died of a fatal heart condition shortly after being born and was burried in a Potter's Field on Hart Island. This field has many deceased that none of the family members even know they were buried there. There are up to 1 million people buried there.

I love the dedication this mother had in finding her baby's remains. It had to have been heart wrenching to not even have a grave to visit. I am glad she found the lady who assisted her in the search for her baby. I would feel lost if I didn't know where my son was buried. When I am having a down day, I go visit him and it makes me feel better. If Castan doesn't survive, I am going to request the cemetary bury him right next to his big brother. I know it is wishful thinking, but I like to think Odd would be taking care of Cas. Kind of depressing too.

Birth control bashful

This article is discussing how baby boomer men and women differ in their thoughts on birth control. The men don't really discuss birth control. The women have no problem with it. They both tend to think that contraceptives are a "woman thing". Men of the generations after the baby boomers have become more promiscuous and are more willing to openly discuss birth control and abortions.

It is amazing to me the differences of generations. The older men I know usually won't talk about my pregnancy, other than to ask if I am doing ok. If I go into details, they tend to get uncomfortable. I couldn't imagine living in an era where my husband would want me to keep everything about my birth control and pregnancy to myself. He is so in tune with everything about me, that he gets every symptom I get. It amuses me when he is at work, and gets heartburn about the same exact time that I do. I am glad I live in a generation that I can openly discuss whatever I want with him. Wouldn't change it for anything.

Brave mom

This article is about a mom who laid herself over her kids during the tornadoes in Indiana. She tried her best to shield the children from the tornado. Her legs were crushed in the process. Her son then crawled out of the debris, and went to find help. The lady used the blanket they had covered themselves with as a tourniquet to prevent herself from bleeding out. She lost both legs, one just above the knee, the other just below the knee.

This woman is so incredibly brave and selfless. She thought of her children first and did what she could to protect them, causing herself pain. I am in awe of this incredible woman, and of her son for getting help as fast as possible. This story actually brought tears to my eyes. Any mom would try to protect their babies, but she went the extra distance and ended up losing both legs. I feel bad she lost her legs, but am so glad that she and her children made it out ok. Kudos to her.

My life goings on-emotional wreck

I am going to start this week with my "life blog". I got the results back from my amniocentisis Thursday. The diagnosis was not good. My son has something called Triploidy. I was told he would either die while inside of me, and I would have to deliver him after, or he would die soon after birth. I went from being told my baby may have Down's Syndrome, to being told he will not live. There is a very slim, almost non existent chance that the abnormality is being caused by my placenta. The doctor said it would be a miracle, if this is the case. We are praying for that miracle. I am trying so hard to believe he is going to be ok, but living minute by minute, wondering if that kick is the last one I will feel, is excrutiating. I am not looking for sympathy, though the sympathy, faith, and compassion my friends and family have shown us has astounded me. I decided to sell bracelets and if he lives, all proceeds will go to Children's Miracle Network, if he doesn't, they will go towards his funeral. Within 2 hours, I had orders for all 200 bracelets I had ordered, and had to order more. I have never felt like we had people we could rely and this situation has just shown me that there are so many who care. The only person, it seems, who does not believe in Castan, is the specialist who gave me the results. He was so dead seat that Cas will die, that he told me "since the chances of him living are so slim, I see no reason to follow up." I was in shock. Where was the compassion doctors are supposed to have? Oh well, I choose to believe that jerk is wrong, and when I deliver my baby boy, I will call him up and tell him so. Time for me to get to bed. Castan is currently kicking my laptop, so I think he decided I am done with homework for the night. :-)

My life goings on-so anxious this week.

I am going to start doing the one blog a week about my family, my life, whatever is going on around the Brown house. This week is a not so good week for me. Almost 2 weeks ago, I had my baby's gender/measurement ultrasound. I was told he is too small for how far along I was. I had to go to a specialist who proceeded to tell me that there is a 80-90% chance that there is something wrong with Castan. The doctor said that his abdomen is not growing with the rest of his body, and is about 3-4 weeks behind the rest of his body. Everything else looked great. Doctor T. wanted me to have an amnio and CVS done to see if Castan has too many chromosomes. I was terrified. I didn't know whether or not I wanted to find out if he really had something wrong with him. I felt like Doctor T. pressured me into getting the amnio and CVS done. It takes 2 weeks to get the results back. Friday I am supposed to find out if Castan has something wrong with him, and what it may be. I have been praying like crazy that he is just small. I wish this weeks would just go by. On another note, my girls are doing great. My husband is doing good in school. And we are also starting a new business, selling coffee. So, all in all, life is good.

Look at me, look at me.

This article is about John F. Kennedy's nephew, Douglas. He was charged for allegedly twisting the arm of a nurse and pushing another with his knee while trying to take his son out of a hospital. He states he was just taking him for a walk.

This story is a little unnecessary for me. I think it would have never even showed up if the man hadn't been related to JFK. There was no evidence that he was trying to kidnap his son. The nurses have no marks from the incident. Douglas also had a doctor friend with him, who stated that the nurses originally gave Douglas permission to take the baby outside. I think this story is just a publicity stunt. Granted, he maybe should not have taken the infant outside, but there was no reason for the nurses to get hostile about it, nor should he have put his hands on them. Dumb story, I say.

This is just ridiculous

This article discusses how the House Democrats have proposed limits on men on whether they can have vasectomies or not. This is in rebuttal to the House of Representatives in Georgia proposition to ban abortions for women who are past 20 weeks of gestation. The Democrats think that men should not be able to choose not to have children because they think their judgement is more valid than the General Assembly.

Now, I am not a man, obviously, but this is just dumb. There is a huge difference of a fetus that already has a heartbeat, fingers, toes, eyes, ears, etc compared to some sperm. The man should have the right to decide if he wants children or not. I disagree with abortion, but I think women should have that right as well. But to compare a vesectomy to a post 20 week abortion? Some people's ideas are just nuts. It's nowhere near the same thing. Sperm is not a baby. It may become a baby, IF the man were to have sex but it is not when a vasectomy is done. A vesectomy is also the prevention of unwanted children, not the solution of a child that is already made. This article just irritated me to no end. I know I will probably get negative comments from those who disagree, but oh well.

What kind of sick individual would do such a thing?

This article is about a 61 year old teacher who is being charged with having bound students and put cockroaches on them. He also supposedly held spoons of semen to their lips. There are 23 alleged victims, all but 2 are females. They are all between the ages of 7 and 10. He has a $23 million bail. He plead not guilty.

This is just downright disgusting. How could a grown man want to do this to children? Especially a teacher?? Teachers are supposed to be there to help children, not to pervert them. Those poor babies. My oldest daughter is 7, so this story hits close to home. I would go insane if someone did something like that to one of my girls. Having been molested, I don't tolerate even the suggestion of such a thing. I hope he gets due punishment. How dare he plead not guilty when there are 600 photos as proof, 200 of which were given to the defense attorney? This just sickens me to no end.

Oohh baby, baby.

This article is about the science of kissing. Kissing causes dopamine to be released in the brain. This is the same substance involved in taking illegal drugs, which is why new romances are addictive. There are hundreds of nerve endings in our lips, which send information to our brains. This allows us to make the decision of whether to stay with the person or not.

I love to be kissed. That being said, I have never based decisions on my "romances" on how I reacted to a kiss. The father of my two oldest children was a horrible kisser. That is not why I left him. I left him because he tried to throw me down a flight of stairs when I was 8 months pregnant. My second serious boyfriend was a pretty good kisser. That wasn't enough to keep me with him. When someone is drunk 24/7 and can't even take care of his kids, I don't find him good romance material. Now, my husband is an amazing kisser. Still, not why I married him. He treated my daughters and I like royalty. He has taken care of us since we have been together. Him being a good kisser is just one of the many perks I get from marrying him. And on that note, I think it's time to go give him a smooch. Hahaha.

Addicts

In this article, reseachers are now saying that addicts can recover. They say that to recover, an addict has to admit to being addicted. They state that there are many things that can cause an addict to fail.

I want to call bull on this. I think some addicts can recover, depending on the drug of choice. My mom is a meth addict, and my sister is a crack addict. I don't see either of them recovering. My mom has overdosed, and was actually dead for a few minutes. Yet, as soon as she got out of the psych ward, she was back on the drugs. I also think that if they relapse, that isn't recovering. Recovering would be not doing the drugs anymore. Period. As I have watched my mother and sister's lives get worse the longer they live, I feel my hope that they will ever quit the drugs dwindle. I hate that I can't make them stop. The only thing I can say positively is that I will never touch any kind of drugs.

Teen pregnancy rate

This article states that the rate of teen pregnancies is at the lowest it has been in 40 years. Researchers believe it is because more teens are using birth control. The rate of pregnancy is higher in African Americans and Hispanics than in Caucasians. The rate of abortions is also higher in those races. This is believed to be because Caucasians have more access to birth control.

I don't know if I believe this article. I know way more teenagers who are getting, or have been pregnant, now than when I was a teen. I am not judging them, as I have no right to. I was a teen mom. I just think that shows like "16 and pregnant" and "Teen Mom" make it look glamorous to have babies young. I hope my daughters are smart enough to wait until marriage, but if they do become sexually active, you can bet I will put them on birth control. I know how hard it is to be a teen mom, and I wouldn't want my babies to have to struggle like I did.

Did she need a body guard?

The article I chose for today, is about Whitney Houston's death. She died relatively young, at only 48 years old. She was the guest in a hotel room below hers. The cause of death is still under investigation.

I agree with the rest of the world that her death is sad. I feel bad for her daughter and other relatives. However, I hate that the world will wallow in the death of a celebrity for weeks or even months after they die. Yet, when a military officer or some little old lady who helped out at a soup kitchen dies, they are lucky to have a few words in the local newspaper. I hate that we value people's lives by how much money they make or how pretty they are. I think every life should be valued equally. Let the drug addict have the same respect as the famous football player. After all, our bodies all end up in the ground in the end. (Well, unless you are cremated, but you get my point.)

Yay for the bus lady!

This article was about a bus driver who rescued 6 children from a burning bus. They were on the route home and she smelled something bruning. The children all remained calm while unloading.

Finally a story that didn't make me mad or depressed about our world. It is very rare that I hear a story about someone being courageous. If something like this ever happened with my daughter's bus, I would hope that the driver would take the correct measures. I don't like my daughter's driver. He seems irresponsible and rude. One time last year, he left my kindergartener at school and no one knew where she was. So, hearing a story like this one made me really happy. I give kudos to the lady for having the smarts to react quickly and prevent something horrible for happening.

Glad someone is able to "take a bite out of crime".

This article is about a 23 yr old cold case that has been solved, thanks to DNA. The victim was beaten and murdered to make it look like a burglary. The suspect was in love with the victim's husband, and after he broke of their relationship, she killed the woman. The suspect was a police officer and went on to lead a normal life, got married and had a daughter. The case is now waiting to see of the jury decides if the suspect is guilty.

How can someone pledge their life to serve, yet murder someone? That woman was supposed to be a hero, and instead she took someone else's life. All over a man. It's insane that people are willing to kill for a person who doesn't even want to be with them. I've been rejected. It made me sad. But I didn't go out and kill the person's girlfriend. I am thankful that I am not that twisted. I am so glad that we now have the technology and DNA to catch some of these killers who would otherwise have got away with murder. The extent that we can now track people amazes me. She might just end up in prison, all because of a single bite mark. I really hope that woman gets the punishment she deserves. The victim didn't deserve her life ended. I doubt she had planned to take the man away from the suspect. All I can say is WOW. Just, WOW.

Apologize, really?

This article is about a man who was wanted in the disappearance of his wife in 2009. He had emailed his lawyer a few minutes before blowing his house up. With him were his 2 young sons. The police said the explosion was planned. In the article, it said that his father had also been in trouble for things, such as voyeurism.

This just makes me so sad. Those poor little boys did nothing to deserve their father choosing to end their lives. And to blow them up in their own house? I wonder what he did to the mother. I think the social worker should have tried harder when he took the kids and slammed the door. If that was me, and I smelled gas, I would have broken a window. I wonder if the man had issues from his father in childhood, since it talks about things his father did. Those innocent little boys won't get to grow up because of the selfish choices of their father. This is just another example of the insanity of people. And another thing, why did he email his lawyer? Obviously, he had already made up his mind. If he was sorry for doing something to his wife, he should have paid the consequences, instead of making even more bad decisions. Things like this just make me so mad.

Women's rights, or lackthereof, in Afghanistan

This story is about how women in Afghanistan have very little to no rights at all. It talks about several stories of abuse to women. One of the stories is about how a man killed his wife because she only bore female children. Another story is about how a 15 yr old girl was tortured because she refused to go into prostituition. There are other stories as well.

I swear, this world gets crazier every day. The stories I read or hear about on the news make me so angry, and hurt so bad for the victims. I would not do well in Afghanistan. I am too much of a loud mouth. Not too mention, I don't back down from people, even men. I just don't see how some cultures, such as Afghanistan, can have such far fetched beliefs. How can they feel women are superior to men? All over the world, women do things just as well, if not better than some men. I thank goodness that my husband is not from Afghanistan. If he was, I might be murdered since we have had 3 little girls, or tortured because there is no way I would EVER become a prostitute. When we have our little boy, I know my Joshua will teach him how to treat women as equals, and with the respect we deserve. I got lucky when I found my amazing husband. I know there are alot of women, everywhere, who are treated no better than a dog. I wish I could take all of them in and take care of each one. Ok, I am done with my ranting for the evening.

Online classes are a benefit to some, but are they to all?

This article is about how some schools are allowing students take more online classes. It talks about a girl who is training to become a ballerina, so it's harder for her to take "normal" classes. According to the article, a quarter of a million students were enrolled online last year.

I am a supporter of online classes, obviously. When I was in highschool, I got behind a semester and also found out I was pregnant. I finished school at the alternative school, which had all online classes. It was so much easier for me. It also gave me time to get a job to support my daughter. I'm not supporting teen pregnancy, for the record, but it happens and we need to take care of our own children and not rely on others, so online classes helped me tremendously. Also, I have a phobia of large groups of people, if I don't know them. This is why I chose to do my basic studies online for college. I know eventually I will have to attend actual classes, but I will cross that bridge when I get there. 

One thing I am not too sure on, I don't know if I would have younger kids do online classes. I don't know how well some kindergarteners would handle the classes. My 1st grade daughter loves working on the computer, and it would give her a chance to do more work, since she is ahead of her class in most subjects. All in all, I am all for having more online classes for students.

Natural disaster preparedness

http://www.cnn.com/2012/01/27/us/extreme-weather-prepare-for-worst/index.html?hpt=us_mid

This article is about making sure you are prepared for natural disasters. It references a woman from Alabama who survived the recent torando. It also discusses why natural disasters are happening more often, and what you need to do/have in case of a disaster.

I chose this article because it hit close to home. After last May, I'm pretty sure there are alot more people who will be well prepared for tornadoes. I know several people who lost everything. Luckily, I didn't know anyone who passed away because of the tornado. Reading this article was kind of emotional for me, because I know several people who should not have made it, but did, by some miracle. No one I know was really ready for that disaster. I know that I was not. My house has no basement, so I had all 3 of my daughters in our hallway. They would not listen to me, and kept fighting. When I heard where the tornado had hit, I freaked out because I had dropped my brother and sister off at my mom's on 10th and Rangeline, not knowing she was out of town. I will never forget the terror I felt, trying to reach family and friends that I knew who lived in the destroyed area. My dad had been in Walmart, and the last thing he said to my sister was "I'm in Walmart parking lot, and there is a tornado coming." Luckily, he made it out ok, but the not knowing for several hours was horrific. I can say that I will be more prepared in the even of another tornado. We have our flashlights ready, I get news alerts on my phone, we keep blankets stocked up, and we are looking to move to a house that has a basement. I hope you all stay safe in the coming tornado season!

Healthy meals at school

http://usnews.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2012/01/25/10234671-students-to-see-healthier-school-lunches-under-new-usda-rules

This article is about how the USDA have decided to make school lunches healthier. They are okanning to to add more fruits and vegetables to the menu, and reduce fats and oils. This change will effect millions of children who eat school lunches. The intent is to reduce the level of obesity in America.

I am all for the change. I think the obesity level in America is out of control. I say this, as I myself am not as healthy as I should be. I would much rather my kids have healthy meals than eat some of the things the schools have now. My girls love fruits and vegetables, so I think the change will help get my oldest to enjoy eating at school more.

Talk about a headache!

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/46073617/ns/health-health_care/

This article is about a man who was working in his autoshop, and shot himself in the head with a nail gun. The man didn't realize he had shot himself, and only went to the hospital after getting nauseous the next day. He is doing fine, after having the nail surgically removed. He even joked that he wanted to keep the nail and make it into a necklace.

Now, please tell me how on earth someone could not know they shot themselves witha 3.25" nail? I'm pretty sure that if something that big went into my skull and into my brain, I would feel it. If nothing else, it would give me a massive migraine. I just don't understand how oblivious some people are, especially the fiance who cleaned the wound! I am just glad that the man is not going to suffer and did not die from the incident.

Is money really a reason to murder someone?

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2012/01/23/woman-convicted-in-calif-millionaires-4-murder/

In this news article, a woman from Southern California hired an ex-NFL player to shoot her boyfriend. The boyfriend was a millionaire, who she stole money from by writing herself checks from his account to her personal account. She also stood to receive $1 million from a life insurance policy she had on the boyfriend. She was convicted of first degree murder after several years of the case being unsolved.

I think this story is really sad. I guess I have too much of a conscious because I could not kill another person. I have never been well off, but I don't think money is a reason to commit murder. It makes me sick how our world has become. People nowadays will kill for pretty much anything. It terrifies me that my children have to grow up in such a place.

Does drinking alcohol effect unborn children?

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/46016369/ns/health-pregnancy/

According to the article, the first trimester is the worst to drink during, while pregnant. There have been studies shown that the more alcohol consumed, the higher the risk of fetal alcohol syndrome or other defects. It also states that the first trimester is the most crucial in the fetus' development, therefore the worst time to drink any alcohol. Studies have not been able to fully determine if these beliefs are correct or not, due to varying weights, genetics, diets and other factors.

I personally would never drink if I knew I was pregnant. I could not justify my desire to have a drink, with the risk of possibly harming my child. I know women who have drank their entire pregnancy and the baby came out fine, but I also know of women who only had a few drinks throughout their entire pregnancy and the babies have had nothing but problems with their health or learning abilities. I don't judge those who do drink during pregnancy, because it is their child they could be harming, and their is little proof that it is the alcohol harming them or if it is some other factor in their lives, but again
I personally would not do it.